And Having Not Seen, I Have JudgedIt’s funny how people tend to judge things that they have never seen.
Me: I saw Brokeback Mountain this weekend.
Person: Isn’t that the gay cowboy movie?
Me: Um, some people call it that.
Person: You shouldn’t see that. It glorifies homosexuality.
Me: Really? What part of the movie did you think glorified it?
Person: Well, the whole thing.
Me: Can you give me a specific example?
Person: Well, I didn’t actually SEE the movie.
Me: That’s interesting that you feel comfortable espousing—let alone forming—an opinion about something you’ve never seen.
Person: But take this for example…I don’t need to see pornography to know it’s wrong.
Me: In that specific case, you’re right…pornography is always wrong. But take this for example. Would you see a movie about a man who is the financial accountant for his company, misuses the funds, stabs his coworkers in the back, and commits suicide at the end?
Person: That sounds like a horrible storyline.
Me: Ok, would you watch a movie about a politician who has an affair, and arranges the murder of a rival?
Person: Again ,that sounds like a horrible storyline.
Me: What about a movie about a guy who rapes his sister, threatens his family, and is eventually killed by a family friend?
Person: Where are you getting all these horrible storylines from?
Me: That’s funny that you should ask. The first story I described is pretty much the story of Judas in the Bible. The second story is from the life of Kind David, and the third story is from the life of Absalom, King David’s son.
Person: Oh.
Me: You see, even though things like stealing, murder, rape and lying are wrong, movies and stories involving those things are not always wrong. It depends upon context, how they’re portrayed, and the storyline. The Bible is full of stories involving those things. Just because a story has those elements doesn’t mean the story is glorifying that element. You have to find out where the story’s coming from.
Person: Well…
Me: And in the case of Brokeback Mountain, I don’t feel like they were glorifying homosexuality.
Person: What happened in the movie?
Me: Well, two guys meet while they are herding sheep in Wyoming, and the movie shows their struggle with their feelings for each other, and how they try to hide it from a society that is very unaccepting of them as people because of what they struggle with. The movie doesn’t portray it as right or wrong, it just shows their journey through life struggling with this secret.
Person: Well, it’s good that society doesn’t accept homosexuality as right. It’s wrong.
Me: That’s not what I said. I said that society doesn’t accept them as people. You don’t have to accept a person’s sins to accept the person himself. Jesus accepted all kinds of people without accepting their sins as right. Some people just don’t understand that concept. In fact, in the end of the movie, a crowd kills one of the men because he is gay.
Person: Did you think the movie was good?
Me: It was a very touching, very well done movie. It gives you insight into what people sometimes struggle with. For example, I have a few friends who are gay. One of my friends in particular said that if he had to choose, he would not choose to be gay. Why would he choose to be like this and have ridicule, insults, and abuse thrown at him? That same concept was shown very well in the movie. These two guys did not choose to have feelings for each other. They struggled with it their whole lives.
Person: So you’re saying that homosexuality is not a choice?
Me: I didn’t say that. I think feelings of attraction are often not a choice. It’s what you do with those feelings that is the choice. For example, let’s say you have a friend who stabs you in the back. You will probably feel angry. You don’t say, “I think I am going to try to feel angry.” No, you just automatically feel angry. What you choose to do with that anger is another thing. If you choose to torch the person’s car, now you’ve done something wrong.
Person: I see. That makes sense. Maybe I will go see that movie.
Me: You can if you want, but don’t feel pressured to if you don’t want to. The point I was trying to make is that you shouldn’t espouse an opinion as truth if you don’t really know what you’re talking about. You made a judgment based on something you heard, when it wasn’t necessarily true.
Person: Thank you for sharing with me, and preventing me from looking judgemental and uninformed in front of others.
Me: No problem. I’m sure you’d warn me if you saw me doing something potentially embarrassing.
Person: You have something nasty in your teeth.
Me: Thank you. See?
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